March Midnight Musings
Gonna try to do a quick post. After weeks, I finally garnered the activation energy to start writing this post. Many thoughts have swirled in my mind and I haven’t got the motivation to jot it down. I guess I may already forget what I wanted to say. Still, lemme just try describing the highlights or perhaps the highs and lows of these past few weeks in March.
To be honest, March kicked off to be rather monotonous. Every day is a humdrum as I find myself committing to the same routine – slept late, woke up late, went for work and lazed my time away at home thereafter. On Mondays, Thursday and Sundays, I visited UTown for band practices with NUS Wind Symphony when Natasha casually/cordially invited me to join her for their annual InTempo Concert which was held last Sunday, 20th March. On the second week of March, I left for Penang with Alika and Melwin. And for the third week, it was a respite from work since my boss went holiday and I spent the time rehearsing for the concert.
To The Stars
I find that I was performing the concert more for myself than for others this time. I sent out a few invitations and elicited zero positive response. I had already expected this since I thought I hit my quota during my concert with Novo at the start of February. Frankly speaking, whilst I was heartened by the 9 who came down specially to support me, I was also stained with a tinge of disappointed with the reasons or s0-called legit reasons those who rejected gave me. The one or two who cited cost as their justification scored the highest in the scale of dismay. This time, on my side, I guess I was also half-hearted in the ticket sales since I was a little underwhelmed by the negative response beforehand. I feel bad for inviting the same group who attended before so I chose not to directly invite them. And I feel even more reluctant to approach some whom previously rejected me. Call me superficial or anything, I was disturbed at how I put on an indifferent facade when my invitation reciprocated rejection with a myriad of reasons. Maybe I just need to learn to accept and not expect everyone to set aside time and priority level for me. On the same note, I am sorry that I gotta miss Daiwen’s 21st as she specially invited me. If you’re reading this, I am really honored to be part of your exclusive celebration.
Still, it was still a rather enjoyable experience spent with the band. Enjoy the process – such a saying resonates with me this time as I got to know many new people or future peers even before I matriculate. It’s a privilege to be in this really bonded clarinet section that warmly welcomes and accepts me as a new player. Never at any one point had I felt like I was a stranger. We ended the concert by celebrating it at Peperoni Prizzeria with their huge-ass pizzas, treated by our beloved SLs. Fancy how most of them can also tolerate my lame jokes and many apologies to the minority whom my exotic humor has provoked. Apart from the great ambiance, it’s also an eye-opener to be playing some of the really challenging pieces like Lost Moon. I admit that I was not hundred-percent prepared even during the day of concert; only just ready to present the pieces. Yet, my musical limits have been stretched and I believe I have made much improvement in my playing since then. All in all, thanks Nats for opening the door to such a good experience!
Departed on 6th March morning with Alika, I was exhilarated to take my first unexpected flight of the year. We arrived two hours shortly after the take-off and I was not ready to embrace the really hot weather. Besides eating and eating, one great highlight of the trip was the visit on the 3rd day to the Penang Hill – the highest hill in the island with its peak situated at 800m above sea level. The view at its apex was spectacular with buildings looking like ants from above. The journey back and forth the top was also an interesting one the train brought us through the steepest railway track in the world woah.
On the 2nd day, Alika and I roamed George Street in its heritage trail where we got to explore the various famous paintings on the alleys which are apparently tourist attractions. We also got to visit the Upside-down Gallery similar to the Trick-eye Museum back at home, but only cheaper. At night, we met up with the rest and gallivanted at a mall and then went to sing for 3 hours. It didn’t end on a good tone though due to someone’s inconsiderate remark, no pun intended. All in all, the trip was a good getaway from the boring and stressful life in Singapore although there were several angsty moments when I felt really sleepy, nauseated from long car rides and frustrated with other trivial matters. The traffic there was really haphazard too – great respect to the drivers out there.
Lastly, the trip somewhat makes me appreciate some of the things back at home such as the infrastructure and weather but definitely not the cost of living bleh. Thank you Melwin’s friends for showing us around and even driving us from places to places, Melwin’s dad for the warm welcome, the treat at the bar where I got to play my first dart game and driving us all the way to the end of the prominent Penang Bridge when I said I wanted to see it lol, and also Melwin for opening up your place for us to stay during the five days.
In a blink of an eye, it has been two months since I undertook this job as an admin staff. I am glad to have a really great boss who really values my welfare and well-being. From increasing my pay twice in the first week, to buying snacks for me occasionally, to entertaining my jokes and nonsense, and to never reject my requests to take off for other commitments, I wonder when will the next time I got to enjoy such privileges as an employee. While the workload is also piling up, I am proud to have settle most of the administrative clogs that were accumulated before me. Admittedly, sometimes I feel a little unmotivated to head to work for various reasons such as the inevitable travel time of 1h+ back and forth which really drains my finances for the transport fees. The drawback of having such flexible working hours is probably not earning enough albeit just sufficient to not suffocate that much. Business seems to be dwindling and I am trying all means to get it pumped again.
Yesterday, my boss was nice enough to raise up my work commitment level after seeing my snapchat that my Uni work was imminent. I told her that starting next week, I won’t be able to attend work due to lectures and she was really understanding about it. We briefly discussed about the plan to look for a replacement and I promised to find one before I leave tentatively in end-May. I also promised to clear up some of the existing administrative encumbrance before I leave, and may also come back one day next time to assist in some work too. It’s merely March and I already feel like I’m already leaving the next day for some reasons lol. Above all, I hope I have made a difference, a contribution.
The inevitable commitment that I would have embraced sooner or later. The past two months were a huge mistake due to great procrastination that caused my workload to pile up like the Penang Hill. I should have expected it and planned my time more wisely. Yet, the spirit is willing but the body is weak. I am dampened will ill-discipline and nothing has been started. It’s no nonsense since my future is concerned here and I should really get started. Classes are commencing next week and I have barely revised the first chapter. I do not wish to appear like an ignorant fool who thinks he has it all. Some nights I shuddered when the thought of losing the prestigious place crept in me. Zhijie, stop gaming and start the ball rolling, will you?
Another aspect that I have totally neglected ever since the months before ORD. I always had the urge to run but my bed tempted me while my mind seduced me. IPPT is coming in two months’ time and time waits for no one. Let’s do something about it yeah? And also, it’s perhaps time to sleep earlier, not 4am like now.
Seems like my quick post isn’t that quick.
for a better next time