The Heartbreaking Break

by hozhijie

BP: October W IV

251015; 2125; the heartbreaking break

currently booking in now after a long ten days break which burned my five days of leave away. it actually feels pretty long but I just can’t get enough. I wouldn’t have felt so unprepared and reluctant to go back camp if it’s sufficient. The hiatus is also rather unproductive as I spent most of my time playing Maple. Of course, it’s made alive by the enjoyable meet ups with many people whom I haven seen for long.

On Sunday, I met Michael at Clementi MRT before heading to NUS UCC for a concert put up by the NUS Winds Symphony. I attended the same concert at the same time last year but this time, I didn’t leave halfway unlike before lol. I loved the concept and it’s certainly worth the twelve bucks. Michael left early to book in after the concert and I joined some of my JC band mates thereafter. Waited for Nats & Ivy who performed. The group of us then walked to Utown for dinner at the food court there. It’s a pleasant catch up and the company’s great as always.

Monday kicked off with lunch and then a 3 hour cycling session with Kenan, the irritating guy I met in CAT term last year. We met up as he thought it’s great to do so since we haven’t done it since the course. The afternoon went better than expected and there’s no awkward barriers la. Looking forward to more meet up next time!

Tuesday was a humdrum. I basically just stared at my com throughout. Nonetheless, I got my uni administrative work done and applied for the iBLOC programme. I’m left with the FAS and will be doing it next week when all the documents are ready. I also spent some time to apply for the MOE Teaching Internship as I thought it’s good to spend a period of three months starting next January to explore more about this industry which sparks a little interest in me. I can also get some income as well as to beautify my almost nonexistent portfolio too. The group interview is scheduled to be held at end November and I hope I can pass it decently lol.

Wednesday was much better. Woke up in the late noon and met Serene at Dhoby Ghaut. She brought me to Fish & Co and we had some catch up over lunch which was on her after her requested interview of me for her school work. Treated KOI in return la and made an impromptu walk to Peninsula to purchase a new guitar bag for myself. We then chanced upon an open water fountain and idk what possessed me to actually try to get into the fountain for some fun shots in the middle of a relatively crowded public place. Got a little wet accidentally due to me calculating wrongly when the water was sprayed up. Had fun though. It’s already around 1800 when I returned home. Plan to meet Xuanle failed as he overslept and already had his dinner cooked at home. The latter is also the reason why our preceding plans to meet up always failed.

Thursday was kinda lame. Met up with Xinhui at night for dinner at Bugis though. It’s an embarrassing meet up as always. Had a good and fun talk.

Friday…woke up late and went for NET at night. Thanks Praise for helping me get my dinner there. Slept late at around 0500. Woke up early before 1100 to meet my BMT section mates at Dhoby lol. It’s been long since we saw each other la. The attempts to organise an outing always failed due to conflicting schedules. Whilst the attendance was five people away from full this time, it’s a great time spent together over lunch and then movie. Some of us caught Bridge of Spies. It’s the longest non action film I’ve caught without falling asleep. I screwed up the seats for some of us too TWICE and caused some shameful stuff to happen hahahah. The movie had a high rating online. I’m not sure whether to agree or not since I’m not used to its genre. The action was mainly in term of speech and words. Kinda intellectual too. It ended by 1700 and we soon went our own ways.

I headed to Edge for youth service. Good sermon for great reminders. Body is weak though. Took the church bus to meet Melwin at Tampines afterwards. Last minute plan. We had Ajisen for dinner and I always love the iidako there for its portion and price. Felt quite tired already so didn’t stay for long after dinner. Reached home around 2200. To my aghast, I still played my com till midnight..and slept as late as 0500…missed service and woke up only at 1500. Had late lunch and then used my com again and left with a limited time for me to tidy my room a little. Did QT and left house at 2040 to dabao my davourite dinner at Bonchon Bugis before taking a train to camp. Currently It’s 2201 and I’m one stop away from my destination.

I realised how bad my habits are during this ephemeral break. Firstly, because of the tremendous amount of time I spent on my games, I didn’t fulfil my goal of cleaning my entire room. Secondly, I’m honestly addicted to this expensive game. Thirdly, I shall admit that I actually hundreds of dollars on this game recently relentlessly. I don’t feel good about this and I can see my self control deteriorating. It’s not going to be sustainable and it gotta stop. Gonna save for the rainy days. It’s easier said than done as always. I will try my best. Fourthly, I have become an owl whenever I have breaks. Sleeping late and then waking up late..I feel so unhealthy.

I also lost my debit card for the second time yesterday. My 11B is also not found yet and this has to happen. Called the bank to terminate my card yesterday but didn’t do it immediately as my extravagant habit made my account worthless. Feel like exhaling a big sigh now HAISSS

It’s less than two months from the big day. And I always have this perpetually ominous feeling that it’s never going to come. Am I thinking too much? I pray that God will bring me through these last 54 days safely.

This upcoming week seems rather eventful with a 3 day stay out course in Clementi camp followed by an anniversary gathering at MHCamp where I’m also a person of contact for my unit.. Right now, I shall stop thinking so much and only hope to quickly reach my bunk to have my tasty Bonchon and Blackball milk tea.