Tried and Tired

by hozhijie

120515; 2327; Tried and Tired
Today was indeed a pretty long day. Slept quite late last night once again and only had 3-4 hours of sleep before waking up for IPPT. While we gathered at 0630, the activity only started past 0800 when the sun was getting hotter. I started with the push up station and didn’t hold much hope for it. Much to my surprise, I actually hit in unexpected counts of 55. I didn’t expect myself to do that many as I have not even trained for it lol. Still, there are many rooms for improvement such as mastering the standard push up requirement as my arms still find it uncomfortable to bend correctly. PuiHay was there to tease me all along lol.
Didn’t do that well for sit up thereafter with only 44. After some calculations, in order to hit silver, I could afford to run 12 minutes or so for my 2.4KM. I anticipated my stamina to take a heavy toll on me. True enough, I found myself struggling to keep up every round. In the final lap, I was already panting heavily but accompanied my peer who was not feeling well to finish the run together.
This is probably one good thing that happened after so long although I still didn’t hit my ideal goal of getting a gold. As stated in my past posts, getting a silver was already a chore for me since my fitness at a bottom low level. Glory to God for the ability to clinch or maintain that award despite my limitations and weaknesses. Jesus has indeed granted me the ability to do my best and achieve more than what I deserved.
After the test, I caught up with puiHay at the mess while we had our breakfast. I visited his bunk after that and it seemed like the building actually has accommodation for my unit ley. I stayed there for awhile before heading back. It’s about 1100 by the time I returned to my bunk. Tried to take an afternoon nap but it’s not working and idk why. As usual, it’s quite hot and stuffy; I have been sweating more than sleeping. And my body just couldn’t take a quick nap whenever I am awaken from a sleep.
I headed back to the building for a session around 1330. While it is quite dry, some things are worth anticipating for. Thereafter we went to the mess for our post event activity. That was when something unfortunate happened to me. There was a segment when the birthday personnel for April and May were called up on stage one by one to receive a birthday cake from the commander. Dismayed a little, my name was missed due to no apparent reasons. The short but influential moment that happened after that was somewhat disgraceful too. Once again, negative thoughts started to swirl and build up. I questioned myself incessantly why must all the misfortune fall on me when the probability of getting one is usually negligible? Why does God allow such humiliation to proceed. I was filled with indignation and felt unjustified. Not because I didn’t get presented among everyone else as it was indeed a trivial matter. But because of the reason aforementioned – it seems like it always has to be me bearing all the unfairness that the world around me can offer.
The night went past quickly. Stand by area was like a breeze although it’s something I really abhor as it always opens the door for criticisms to come in freely. Had takeaway McDonald’s for supper. The challenge to remove a broken section of a key in our bunk lock caused some minor disagreement too but everyone just followed with the flow amicably.
The environment now is so humid that I can feel the heat hitting on me. I hope I can be allowed to book out tomorrow night to attend my appointment on Thursday. And may I get more rest tonight and stopped being addicted by the frustrating biased monopoly app I downloaded.
Hope, Integrity
2354
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